This morning I really did not want to go to yoga. I went to this teacher’s class last week and although the poses and sequence wasn’t too challenging the way that she taught was. With a new, and different focus on alignment I felt like I had no clue what I was doing. I felt like a beginner but in something I had been doing for 10 years.
I got into a lot of different and new ways of working out my body and mind last year and I really didn’t keep a consistent yoga routine, so in more than one way do I feel a bit like a beginner in class. Besides all of that, I had indulged on wine, chocolate, and snacks last night. Which sure did not give me the extra motivation to go, but I knew that if I didn’t go to this class I would not get any movement in for the day. And, I know that I am a happier, more present, more alive, more gracious person when I do get my body moving. So, I went.
I wasn’t too stoked to be there, but I was proud of myself for getting my ass there. She started the class with a breathing exercise which I normally would enjoy, but she wanted us to inhale for 8 counts and exhale for 10 counts. I immediately was screaming in my head, “What the F$%*!” That is something to work up to, not just start at! I heard myself freaking out and saw that I had a choice. I can either keep screaming at myself and the teacher in my head….or I CAN TRY to do it.
So, I tried. I inhaled slowly to the count of eight, and exhaled slowly to the count of ten. And, guess what? I COULD DO IT! It wasn’t the easiest thing to do, but I was able to!
I had made up that I couldn’t because I haven’t practiced breathe work in a while. I had set myself up to be such a beginner that I wasn’t even going to try, immediately dismissing the guidance, with a “YEAH Right. I can not do that”. I was also, resorting back to past experiences that I have had with breathing exercises of a higher count.
I remember being at an Ashram at India and waking up at 5:30am for 6am satsang, where we sat and meditated for 2 hours with breathing exercises, prayers, and kirtan. I was so uncomfortable sitting for that long that it was incredibly challenging for me and I was often times screaming inside of my head. So, this morning, I know I was channeling some of that old discomfort, too.
I took my I CAN TRY attitude with me throughout the rest of the class and it transformed my experience. It wasn’t a I can do everything attitude! I still took care to notice that perhaps poses that I used to be able to fly into were not so easily available today. I listened to my body, but I also listened to the teacher who was guiding me into new ways of looking at the poses and opening myself up even more (safely).
So, there you have it. Lesson learned once again. If you tell yourself there is no fucking way. It will most likely be a challenging path if you even choose to take it….which I doubt you will.
If you tell yourself to at least try, every imaginable possibility is open to you. {click to tweet} How will you know, if you don’t try? {click to tweet}
